


Put Me At Ease

by ChelseaIBelieve



Series: Unsolicited Advice (12 Days of Hockeymas) [3]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Hopeful Ending, M/M, Post-Break Up, Post-Trade, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-17
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-03-01 22:52:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2790644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChelseaIBelieve/pseuds/ChelseaIBelieve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes there's a perfectly good ending and sometimes things don't turn out like you expected, but the ending you didn't expect might be the best ending of all. (Past Leddy/Saad and Bollig/Shaw. Pre Saad/Shaw.)</p><p>Can be read as part of the series or as a stand-alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set on Dec 15 2014, right after the back-to-back Islanders and Flames games over the weekend.

“Okay, come here, you two.” Patrick waved Brandon and Andrew over after practice on Monday morning following back-to-back games against the Islanders and Flames.

They exchanged questioning looks, but crossed the room to where Patrick was changing.

“I know we just played both of your boys.” Patrick paused to frown. “Well, ex-boys. How are you doing?”

“Alright.” Andrew shrugged. “We talked and it was a nice bit of closure.”

“Yeah.” Brandon agreed, glancing over at Andrew with a small smile.

“Okay, well, whenever you guys are ready to move on, you should really talk to each other. You went through basically the same thing. Oh, I know!” Patrick acted like he’d just gotten an idea, even though it was obvious to everyone that he was acting. “You two should go Christmas shopping together today. You know, grab lunch, talk about how much trades suck, maybe get a few drinks together.”

“I’m up for it if you are.” Brandon turned to Andrew. “We could try out that new burger place?”

“Sounds good. Let me just grab my things.”

“What are you doing?” Jonny asked, stepping up behind Patrick after they’d walked away. “You know they’re still dealing with the break-ups.”

“I think they could be good for each other. As friends for now, but as something more down the road, if they want.”

“Can we do our Christmas shopping today, too? You spent all day conspiring with Malkin last time we were supposed to go.”

“Of course, babe.” Patrick stole a quick kiss, to the teasing coos of Sharpy and Hossa, who were standing nearby. “Shut up.”

* * *

After deciding to shop first and eat later, they headed down to Michigan Ave together and parked in a nearby parking garage. They strolled along the shops, stopping to buy gift cards and presents for their family members while discussing their plans for Christmas. Andrew’s family was planning on coming to Chicago to visit, but Brandon was going back home for the holidays.

They crossed south of the river and Brandon nudged Andrew’s side with a nod of his head at the Blackhawks Store.

“Are we being awesome if we go in there, or are we just being a problem?” Andrew asked thoughtfully.

“Awesome. Let’s go.” Brandon grabbed his arm to drag him inside, taking the stairs two at a time. “This is so much nicer than the old one.”

No one noticed them at first and they slipped over to where fans could be photoshopped into pictures with players.

“Do we go Twilight Zone and get pictures of us with ourselves? Or should I get a picture with fake-you?” Andrew debated teasingly.

“We should get one with Kaner, just to annoy Tazer. He is the one who sent us here together in the first place.”

“Um, hi?” They heard a voice and turned to see a boy who appeared to be about ten standing behind them.

“Hi, buddy.” Brandon smiled at him sadly, noticing he was wearing a Leddy jersey.

“Are you…?” He trailed off shyly.

“Yeah, we are. Anything we can do for you?” Andrew squatted down close to him. No one had noticed yet, but they were bound to at some point.

“Can you sign my jersey?”

“Of course we can!” Andrew told him earnestly.

“Let me just get a pen from my mom.” The boy bounded off to where his mom was watching the whole thing unfold a few feet away and obtained a Sharpie from her purse. “Here you go!”

He turned around to present them with the back of his jersey, which had quite a few signatures already. Brandon trailed his fingers momentarily over Nick’s signature right in the middle of the 8 before signing off to the side in between signatures from Bicks and Duncs.

Andrew took the marker from him and signed in a blank space near the shoulder before capping the marker and handing it back to the boy.

“I don’t want to hold you two up, but is there any way we could get a picture?” The boy’s mom asked, brandishing her phone.

“Not a problem.” Brandon answered, pulling the boy in between him and Andrew for the picture. They all smiled for the camera, and the flash drew the attention of a few other people.

They stayed to take pictures and sign things for almost an hour, the group finally dying down to just the new people who were coming into the store. When they had made their way out of the store, they were getting hungry.

“Food?” Andrew suggested, turning in the direction of the restaurant they’d been wanting to try.

The walk to the restaurant was quiet, both of them lost in thought as they passed all of the Christmas decorations. It was only a few blocks away and they were seated quickly once they arrived, the waitress smiling but not seeming to recognize them.

“How are you doing, really?” Andrew asked after they’d placed their orders. “You guys seemed okay when we were hanging with him, but how much of that was real and how much was a front?”

“You know, I’m doing better. It still hurts when it comes up, but it’s not as bad. You?”

“I’m doing okay. It’s rough, but we’re still friends and we both know we’ll find someone else who can make us happy.”

“Did you guys talk about doing the whole long-distance thing?”

“A little, but it just seemed too rough and as much as we loved each other, we didn’t think we could make it work. It was just better to make a clean break.”

“Nick wanted to, but-” Brandon trailed off and looked down at his hands. “He wasn’t the one, you know? We both knew it wasn’t quite right, but it was hard admitting that. I feel ready to move on, though. Find someone new, but maybe not a teammate again. It’d suck to go through this again.”

“But it was worth it.” Andrew pointed out with a small shrug. “It’s harder in some ways, but I think I’d enjoy dating a teammate again, especially the right teammate. It sucked when he got traded and it ripped my heart out, but I wouldn’t take it back. Would you?”

“I don’t know yet. What if one of us got traded?”

“It’s always a possibility, but would you risk it if you thought he was the one?”

“Nick, or someone else?”

“Someone else.” Andrew caught his eye and tilted his head questioningly, reaching out to put his hand over Brandon’s on the table.

“Ask me again after we win the Winter Classic.” Brandon chuckled, but it was a little hollow. “You’ve had longer to come to terms with this. You had most of the off-season to deal with it.” He looked straight at Andrew as he continued, making sure he understood the meaning behind his words. “Hopefully I’ll be able to say yes to the right guy when the time comes, but I’m not there yet.”

“That’s okay. I can wait.”

 


	2. Counting Backwards the Days 'Til I'm Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally meant to be part of my summer series, then put off to my 12 Days of Christmas which didn't happen, so now here it is because I'm sick of it sitting in my draft folder. :) Enjoy!

The silence stretched on for a long time, neither sure what to say. The only reason Andrew even knew Brandon had picked up was because he could hear him breathing on the other end. 

Finally, Andrew broke the silence.

“Columbus?”

“I didn’t want this.” Brandon said, sounding defeated.

“I didn’t want this either.” Andrew agreed unnecessarily. “No one did.”

The silence returned, lasting a few minutes before it was broken again, this time by Brandon.

“Do we break up, then? Part as friends?” 

“Fly back to Chicago tomorrow. I need to see you, and we can talk.”

“Okay.”

The line went dead without another word.

* * *

“Help me, Bolly.” Andrew begged desperately as soon as he heard Brandon answer the phone.

“You know, I think it’s poor etiquette to call your ex for advice on your new boyfriend, even if said ex is still a close friend.” 

“I don’t know who else to call.” Andrew admitted with a sigh. “He’s flying in tomorrow and I don’t want to break up, but we’re going to, and it’s just not fair that I have to go through this again.”

“I know you’re frustrated, but you knew what you were getting into when you decided to do this again,” Brandon reminded him patiently, and Andrew bit back a groan of frustration.

“Yeah, but this is fucking Saader. He wasn’t supposed to get traded. He was supposed to stay here and sign a big contract after a bridge deal and win more cups and take over for fucking Tazer whenever he decides to retire. I wasn’t prepared to deal with this.”

“Sure, but these things happen, and you know it. What about if they’d traded you? What was your plan then?”

“My plan was hoping that my contract was small enough that they’d let me just stay here forever down on the fourth line while Saader kicked ass and he could be like my sugar daddy with his big contract. I’d even take a pay cut if I needed to, just so long as I could stay here.”

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you have to let him go, Mutt.” Brandon spoke softly, trying to calm Andrew down from his frantic state.

“I know. I just don’t fucking want to. I really thought he was the one, you know?”

“Maybe he is, but you know it’s not practical.”

“Fuck practical.” Andrew spat out angrily. “This fucking sucks. Let’s talk about something else before I punch something.”

“Whatever you want, Shawzy.”

* * *

“I’ve been wondering when you were gonna call,” Nick said in lieu of a standard greeting when he picked up the phone.

“Please remind me of all the reasons we decided a long-distance relationship was a bad idea,” Brandon whined pathetically. “I’m waiting in the airport for my flight back to Chicago.”

“Do you really want me to convince you not to do it, or do you want me to convince you that you should?” Nick asked knowingly, chuckling slightly at Brandon’s ensuing groan.

“You know me too well.”

“I’m not sure I’m the best person to give you advice on this, because I think we did the right thing in ending our relationship,” Nick spoke carefully, pausing at the end.

“But…?”

“But I don’t know that it’s the best option for you two. Then again, long distance relationships are almost impossible.”

“Almost isn’t always.” Brandon pointed out.

“True, but let’s just say that here in Brooklyn, we’re all fucking glad Gagner got traded somewhere nearby because we’re about done listening to Tavares whining constantly about him being out West. It’s not easy, especially when you have the schedules we do. It’s hard to visit, it’s hard to call, it’s hard to play each other. You have to decide for yourself if it’s truly worth it or not. Is being without him in your life that much worse than all the heartache you’ll go through trying to hold on to a relationship?”

Brandon didn’t reply, thinking Nick’s words through quietly.

“Think about it while you’re flying and make your decision before you go see him, okay? Don’t go in there unsure. You owe it to yourself to decide what you want before you talk to him.”

* * *

Brandon let himself into Andrew’s apartment and smiled sadly down at the key in his hand. He walked into the kitchen and found Andrew already sitting down at the table, beer in hand.

He grabbed himself a beer from the fridge and sat across from Andrew.

“So, was it worth it?” Andrew asked, finally looking up into Brandon’s eyes.

“Every minute.”

Andrew nodded silently and looked away, frowning as he stared at a spot on the wall.

“It was so worth it that I don’t want it to end,” Brandon admitted, nudging Andrew’s foot with his own under the table.

“Neither do I.” Andrew sniffled a little as he tried to keep himself calm.

“So, let’s not end it.” Brandon reached across the table and placed his hands on Andrew’s where they were wrapped around his bottle.

“What?” Andrew looked back at him, confusion in his eyes.

“You asked me in December if I’d risk it if I thought you were the one. I went into this relationship with my eyes open, and that hasn’t changed.”

“Are you sure about this?” Andrew asked with a disbelieving expression on his face. “I was fully prepared for you to come in here and break up with me.”

“Columbus isn’t that far from Chicago. They’re certainly closer than New York and Arizona.” Brandon smiled and stood up, pulling Andrew to his feet.

“Huh?” Andrew asked in confusion.

“Never mind. Just something Leddy told me.” Brandon leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Andrew’s lips. “I love you, and you are absolutely worth all of the misery we’ll have to put up with.”

“I love you, and you’re worth it, too. Now come on, we should go over to your place and start packing. You can, uh, bring anything you don’t want to move to Columbus over here.”

“Yeah?” Brandon grinned and wound his arms around Andrew.

“Yeah.”


End file.
